Preparing For NaNoWriMo: A Parody

NaNo is coming swiftly, and with it, comes all kinds of stress and excitement.
Below is a list to help you make your way through these remaining days before the true chaos is born.


Octoer 1st:

Be completely relaxed. No need to worry or panic at all, the month has only just begun. You've got plenty of time. Not sure what story you're going to write? Eh, don't even try to figure it out. It'll come when it's ready.
Besides, you probably won't even be able to think of anything because you have so much time, you want to do something else.
Go do that something else!


October 3rd:

Oh man, you missed a day! Oh well, better late then never amIright?
So to start off, go buy a bunch of junk food. Just a ton. All the junk food. Don't worry about spending money on so called "important" things like binders, notebooks, pens, etc.
Also, make sure whatever you get is at least 50g of sugar per serving, and then neglect the serving size entirely (I mean, we all do that already).
You want as much sugar as possible so you can get a sugar high and write as swiftly as the wind.

(Don't worry about sugar crash, I hear those are just myths.)


October 7th:

Plan on no sleep. None. At all. Sleep is for the week. Are you even doing NaNo right if you get +4 hours of sleep? No, no you are not. Coffee and energy drinks are your friends. Stock up on those.
You know what? Might as well stop sleeping now, so that you're adjusted to the schedule when November hits.


October 18th:

Still haven't come up with a story? That's okay! Because guess what! It's only the 18th, you'll be just fine. 


October 29th:

Now you should clear your writing desk off. No slackers here! We're gonna be prepared for NaNo!


October 31st:

Still no story idea? Oh well, pressure generally gets ideas flowing pretty quickly. You'll surely find something for NaNo before tomorrow!


October 31st (11:59 pm)

Now you're a minute away from the most important day, the day all your hard work amounts to something, the day you begin, the day you play to win. All your training has led to this moment. Get ready! Now is the time you write the fastest, best, most fluent story you've ever written!


November 1st (12:00 am):

Just kidding. Now is the time you panic. :)



Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed this post of me poking fun at all the procrastination that goes into preparing for NaNo.
On Monday, I'll be posting the real Preparing For NaNoWriMo post. If you couldn't tell, this one was purely a joke.

From now until December, the majority of my posts will be NaNo related, seeing as that'll be where most of my time is going.

I hope you have a excellent weekend (or what's left of it)!


                   ~ Edna